Robert Pattinson will dawn the cape and cowl for the upcoming film The Batman. He pushed for the role, had been prepping by reading contemporary and classic comics, and gained a substantial amount of weight (dirty bulking) for the coveted Bat-Physique.

The production is halted because of ‘Da Rona’ and despite an interview in December where Pattinson said he was “weirdly looking forward” to getting in shape for The Batman, Pattinson has recently expressed that he is no longer keeping up with his trainers’ workout instructions and has misgivings about the precedence that “working out all the time” creates.

Wait… What?

Perhaps Patt had a change of heart towards extensive training for roles despite his desire to play a character known for… extensively training.

BUT

When we used our Bat-computer to review Pattinson’s past the evidence points less to championing healthy body expectations and more towards laziness. The effects of the stay-at-home orders are giving many of us some lethargy (even movie stars). It is important to be honest and confront it like a superhero would. After some diggory we have a better perspective on whether Cedric is taking a stance or grandstanding to avoid having to Huffle-buff up.

Humble Beginnings

We know Pattinson firstly as Cedric Diggory from Harry Potter and The Goblet of fire. Apparently, he got the audition because the casting director felt bad for him. Pattinson’s part in Vanity Fair (2004) was cut and he was not told until he arrived at the screening. The casting director felt so bad that when casting her next film (Harry Potter and the Goblet Of Fire) he was the first person to audition for Cedric Diggory. 

*Points for Pattinson: he did beat out Henry Cavill (Man of Steel) for the part of Cedric. (First round goes to Batman)

Twilight Hygiene

According to Crew members on the set of New Moon –“He stinks. I mean, it’s awful. He never showers, and it drives people on the set crazy,”–accounts of Pattinson’s personal hygiene.
In an interview with “Extra” it was asked if he had actually gone 6 weeks without washing his hair. His response, “Probably. I don’t know. I don’t really see the point in washing your hair.”
Also, it is unlikely that his London Apartment (provided by the studio) is any cleaner:

“It’s like, I don’t clean my apartment ’cause I don’t care. I have my apartment for sleeping in and I have my hair for just, you know, hanging out on my head. I don’t care if it’s clean or not.”– Battinson circa 2009

*More Points for Patt: Since the Twilight Saga, Pattinson has earned many accolades from his less mainstream arthouse movies. He was even given a nod of approval from William Dafoe who is no stranger to the comic book movie genre.

He is keeping up with his ‘Diet’

The reassuring news is that he is still keeping up with jogging and his diet. That is, until you see what his “dirty bulking” meals actually look like. One reporter notes, “There’s a theme to Pattinson’s diet: speed or laziness.” TL;DR several of his meals are just slapped together, –one is legit, tuna in the can with tabasco sauce.

See Yourself Become The Villain

It does not sound like the studio is requesting the “intensity” of the Rock, who ships his 40,000 lbs personal gym to locations with him or Chris Hemsworth’s grueling god-like workouts. 

According to reports, “The movie trainer left Pattinson with a Bosu ball, a single weight, and a sincere plea to use both. He however, is ignoring her. “I think if you’re working out all the time, you’re part of the problem,” he says, sighing. By “you” he means other actors. “You set a precedent. No one was doing this in the ’70s. Even James Dean—he wasn’t exactly ripped.”

Given what we now know about Pattinson’s habits this smells (pun intended) like a Trump-era deflection to avoid addressing a lack of drive. His reasoning just doesn’t match the attitude he had just a few months ago towards getting in shape for the role:

“I used to hate working out. In my 30s, I find it very meditative. It’s weird,” 

“When you feel like someone’s not forcing it on you, and you’re doing it for yourself, it’s a very different experience. I’m weirdly looking forward to it.”–Battingson

Unpacking this, it should be noted that several actors including Michael B. Jordan and Chris Pratt have praised the not-so-obvious benefits tied to the physical demands of the roles they accepted. 

When signing up for a part like this, post Batman Begins, the training is ingrained in the essence of the character. That is probably why co-star Zoe Kravitz, is consistently working out 5 days a week. Not to mention, studio trainers tailor programs to help and motivate actors. The effort is to safely build a body that can withstand the requirements of that performance. They incorporate body mechanics that will keep actors safe on set and while performing their scenes and stunts, not just shirtless scenes.

If we take a strip away the glamour of Hollywood we end up with the story of a contractor who stopped doing the work as defined within the contract, while his female co-worker continues to put in more hours…

It is not a good look.

Despite his documented lack of hygiene, he will be featured again on the magazine known for showcasing the most Dapper of Dans. He will not look like a playboy billionaire, but more like that friend you should go check on because he has been posting 5G links to COVID-19 since March.

But seriously, you are THE BATMAN now

Pattinson “wholeheartedly committed to the concept of his ordinariness.” in an interview with The Guardian. Like the ordinary, he has no problem making excuses for himself, but does that mean we should too?

From a geek/nerd perspective this story is reminiscent of the all too common tale of the ‘star player’. The jock who finds himself on the field every game despite not meeting the lowest GPA requirements. Sure, some classes are hard but this dude just isn’t applying himself…

Some of us geeks passed all our classes while running 40-man raids 2-3 nights a week.

We recognize that the pandemic can diminish motivation. Coupled with the uncertainty of when this will “blow over”, we could totally understand if Pattinson wanted to make some adjustments. But, if a guy with a lazy meal plan, a lazy approach to his craft, and lazy hygiene starts skipping out on workouts, you don’t have to be the world’s greatest detective to put this puzzle together. 

Certainly it is a noble cause to support reasonable physical expectation and it just as noble to exhibit the integrity and commitment that makes The Batman, the character we love so much.

What do you think? Is Batman running from his responsibilities or is he legitimately concerned with Hollywood expectations?

Let Us Know, In the Comments Below.

–H00k Out!

PS

When asked about the similarities between himself and Cedric,”I think he is a better person than me.” (Cedric) “tends to do the right thing all the time and I never need to do that.”– The Batman

–-SIGH–